People worry a great deal about gift ideas for their significant other. You hear the common concerns like “did I spend too much?”, or “not enough?”, “is this the one they really wanted?”, and “what was that thing they saw in that store that one time six months ago that looked nice?”. We genuinely struggle to find or do something thoughtful, romantic, memorable, or some composite of those things. However, the best or most obvious solutions are frequently and easily overlooked.
After several years of data collection from gossiping and eavesdropping among friends, family, co-workers, and strangers, a combination of common themes emerged that are sure to please every time!
- A good meal (refer to my earlier blog post here on that)
- A good nap (maybe a topic for a future blog post)
- And companionship (i.e. coitus – plenty of which can be found online on that topic already)
Let’s face it, that’s all that most any creature on the planet desires. They don’t necessarily need to be in that order, but typically work best if all three are covered. Be as creative as you’d like on the timing or duration of things. Or the location, serving size, or presentation! I mean, isn’t it all about the effort that makes things so special or meaningful anyway…?
And these concepts work at all times really. Just that they are anticipated more specifically on special occasions. It seems pretty likely that’s how the tradition of making a wish by blowing out the candles on the cake started. I’d wager that most of the wishes by adults are for some or all of those 3 things.
Anything else seems to be a mere distraction from the ultimate three. And generally your partner could just save up and buy specific items they want on sale at other times of the year anyway. You may even find them going on a shopping spree for themselves just before their birthdays or anniversaries or major holidays. They don’t always realize how much it might drive us crazy, but they make those purchases because they’re trying to limit your options down to those top 3 results, and in some cases, particularly the last one.
This is why people struggle to come up with a list of ideas. They just say things like “you don’t need to get me anything”. However, they’re really thinking “as long as I get those other 3 things!”. Or that’s why you get suggestions like socks, underwear, a belt, or a tie. Even then it’s because they’re thinking of getting undressed and into bed for the main celebratory event (the nap, of course).
Now if they do provide a list of other ideas, it’s only so the children, other relatives, and friends can participate without things getting all weird. (In fact, it’s probably pretty awkward that they may be reading this right now!) Even there, a simple shift to synonymous terms for “companionship” is all it takes. For example, “your presence is present enough.” Or “join us for dinner and cake.” Showing up takes effort and that means a great deal. And if you can’t be present, be sure to call or send a card or a message that you’re thinking especially of them. Just make some gesture to prevent others from feeling lonely or forgotten on their special day. Simple enough!
Sure, there may be specific gift ideas that would be ideal for someone you know very well and that they would indeed appreciate greatly. But it’s doubtful that you’ll find a more universal and holistic list than the one suggested. I’d even venture to guess that the order might matter more to some partners more than others. And that some snuggling may be involved with the nap, depending upon circumstances or individual preferences. However, since it’s a special occasion, you might as well put up with the snuggling if that’s what will make your significant other happiest.
Looking forward to hearing about any additions or alternatives you might have to improve the list!